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lyrics

Cool inventions and really bad jokes
Bad butch wardrobe and drinks with the blokes
Tenure track fuckup always doing the most
I wanna backpack that helps me catch ghosts
Catch ghosts

Holtzmann invented the proton pack
She opened up a portal and still came back
She's got her own fusion reactor in Hoboken
And she chews her food with her mouth wide open
Mouth wide open

I wanna be Holtzmann when I grow up
Stop giving a fuck, stop giving a fuck
I wanna be Holtzmann when I grow up
Stop giving a fuck, stop giving a fuck

I wanna be Holtzmann, whoah-oh
I wanna be Holtzmann, whoah-oh

Wish I could pull off a jumpsuit like her
Walks like a jock and fucks like a nerd
Left hand in the air flipping off the man
Right hand deep in a Pringles can
Pringles can

I wanna be Holtzmann when I grow up
Stop giving a fuck, stop giving a fuck
I wanna be Holtzmann when I grow up
Stop giving a fuck, stop giving a fuck

I wanna be Holtzmann, whoah-oh
I wanna be Holtzmann, whoah-oh

Jillian Holtzmann, PhD
Who needs social skills with friends like these?
She's messy and tough, and she sticks to it
I wanna be an engineer who doesn't give a shit!
I wanna be Holtzmann

I wanna be Holtzmann when I grow up
Stop giving a fuck, stop giving a fuck
I wanna be Holtzmann when I grow up
Stop giving a fuck, stop giving a fuck!

I wanna be Holtzmann, whoah-oh
I wanna be Holtzmann, whoah-oh

credits

from Reimagined Thrill, released April 15, 2020

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Sidewalk Furniture Durham, North Carolina

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